At Seventeen – Janis Ian

At Seventeen by Janis Ian is a timeless song that resonates deeply with women, especially in midlife. It speaks about the feelings of insecurity, rejection, and longing many experience in their youth. As we grow older, these emotions may resurface, but with a different understanding. For midlife women, the song reflects the journey of self-acceptance and the realisation that life is not about fitting in but embracing who we truly are. Its honest lyrics remind us that beauty, confidence, and self-worth grow from within, especially as we mature.

Lyrics

[Verse 1] I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear-skinned smiles
Who married young and then retired
The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth[Chorus] And those of us with ravaged faces
Lacking in the social graces
Desperately remained at home
Inventing lovers on the phone
Who called to say, “Come dance with me”
And murmured vague obscenities
It isn’t all it seems
At seventeen[Verse 2] A brown-eyed girl in hand-me-downs
Whose name I never could pronounce
Said, “Pity, please, the ones who serve
They only get what they deserve”
And the rich-relationed hometown queen
Marries into what she needs
With a guarantee of company
And haven for the elderly
[Chorus] Remember those who win the game
Lose the love they sought to gain
In debentures of quality
And dubious integrity
Their small town eyes will gape at you
In dull surprise when payment due
Exceeds accounts received
At seventeen[Instrumental Break][Verse 3] To those of us who knew the pain
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball
It was long ago and far away
The world was younger than today
When dreams were all they gave for free
To ugly duckling girls like me[Chorus] We all play the game and when we dare
To cheat ourselves at solitaire
Inventing lovers on the phone
Repenting other lives unknown
They call and say, “Come dance with me”
And murmur vague obscenities
At ugly girls like me
At seventeen

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