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Managing Money in Your Relationship

Midlife can bring about significant changes in relationships, whether it’s navigating a long-term partnership, entering a new relationship, or blending families. Managing money in these relationships requires a mix of communication, understanding and strategic planning.

Here are 6 tips for managing money in your relationship:

1. Agree on how to merge your finances.

Every couple is different, and so are their approaches to managing money. You might fully merge your finances, keep them separate or opt for a hybrid approach (mine, yours, ours).

No approach is right or wrong. Finding a system that suits your relationship dynamics and financial goals matters most. Although you should make this decision at the start of a committed relationship, reconsidering it in a long-term partnership can also be beneficial.

2. Maintain open communication

Open and honest communication forms the cornerstone of financial management in any relationship, as it prevents misunderstandings and builds trust.

Regular “money dates” allow both partners to discuss their financial goals, fears, and expectations.

Use these dates to share your money stories, understand each other’s situations, set joint financial goals, track
progress, or address any money-related concerns. Scheduling these dates in advance ensures they take place.

3. Educate yourselves about personal finance

Becoming knowledgeable about personal finance together can transform your relationship. Money often causes tension but shared financial understanding can reduce this significantly.

This knowledge enables you to make informed decisions, set common goals, and celebrate your financial wins together. It can also strengthen your bond.

So, keep learning about personal finance by reading books/articles, listening to podcasts, attending workshops/seminars, and consulting a financial coach/advisor.

4. Understand each other’s money story

We all have a money story – a collection of experiences, lessons, and emotions about money. Understanding these stories is crucial for managing finances together.

It’s not just about spending or saving habits; it’s about understanding the reasons behind them.

Knowing your partner's financial journey allows for greater empathy and support. It also enables you to start a new, shared chapter, acknowledging the past without being bound by it as you build a future that respects both your dreams.

5. Set shared financial goals

Setting shared financial goals is not just practical; it’s a way to weave your dreams together.

Even with separate finances, you can still establish common goals, such as saving for a home, planning a dream vacation, or preparing for retirement.

It’s also a way of giving your money a purpose which helps you not spend it on something else and ensures you achieve your shared wants.

6. Respect each other’s financial independence

Even if you share your money, respecting and maintaining some level of financial independence is crucial. You and your partner likely have different values and sources of joy.

Maybe you enjoy monthly massages, while your partner prefers daily coffee outings.

Allowing room for personal spending without judgment fosters trust and conveys, I trust your decision-making, which is incredibly powerful.

Remember that managing money in your relationships is more than just paying bills and saving for retirement. It’s also an opportunity to deepen your bond and align your future. These six tips lay the groundwork for both future financial security and a relationship enriched by mutual respect and shared dreams.


Vix Munro is a certified financial coach, mentor, and educator. She’s also an entrepreneur, author, and eternal optimist.

She’s passionate about money, investing and the economy. Her mission is to help women create and grow wealth so that they can live the lives they want.

She believes we all can transform our money mindset, rewrite our money story and become financially empowered. And that this can be liberating, life-changing and fun.

Vix is the author of – Financial Cliteracy:  A Woman’s Guide to RICHES and Financial Pleasure

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